2 Whole Weeks-Part II

Well, the long, grueling, sometimes excruciating 2 weeks have almost come to a close. Ryan comes home Friday night and boy am I ready! I have found these past 2 weeks to be very enlightening. First, it has made me apprecaite single parents all the more. It's hard! Secondly, it has made my heart grow fonder-yes, I know the phrase and have heard it probably 10 times from various friends and family throughout the past few weeks. But 2 weeks has definitely been the longest apart we've ever been...and I hated every minute of it. I sat last week after watching Anne of Green Gables (I guess I needed something mushy to fill the time...and Anne & Gilbert are my favorites!) anyways, back on track...so in a moment of lonliness I wrote this thought down to Ryan, "It's amazing how in the every day "stuff", my love for you has gotten somewhat overshadowed. I've let the bad outweigh the good, the lack of money outweigh the reality that we are SO very blessed, the frustrations outweigh the love...and I'm so glad for this time away because it has revived a love in me for you that I almost didn't know existed!"

And isn't that true for most of us? It's so easy to let the daily grind become our focus. Well, I'm tired of it...I'm ready for something new! Not only in my marriage, but in my relationships with others and most importantly, with Jesus! Lord, give me a clarity of mind and focus to see beyond the "stuff" of today and love You and my family in a new and fresh way! Amen!

2 Whole Weeks

Well, yesterday morning the hubs left for 2 weeks to Germany with the Westgate youth choir. What will I do?!? That's a LONG time! In the past, I've gotten to go on these trips with the choir too, but not this year. People have asked us, "Why don't you guys take the girls?" "Are you NUTS?!?" I reply. No world traveling for us quite yet. Can you imagine traveling for that long with 2 toddlers? I'm having an anxiety attack right now just thinking about it! I know people have done it, but I also know my limits. :)

I actually do have some big plans while Ryan is away.

Plan #1:

Get Evie to sleep through the night.

I know what you're thinking. "Your almost 2 year old doesn't sleep through the night yet?!" I know, I know...it's no good! But honestly, things have been so unique with twins that I can't tackle issues the same way I would with just one baby. So here we are, the girls are 21 months (yes, I said that right...21 MONTHS!) and I'm getting ready to finally tackle a HUGE obstacle. Pray for me! It will be a rough couple of nights, but I'm confident we will all be better for it! The girls & I (Hero too!) will go next week and stay on Whidbey with my parents and I'm SO ready to get this behind us before we go!

Plan #2:

Finish/polish up a few of my songs.

I don't have much free time to sit at the piano, but over these next 2 weeks I will purpose to make time! After the girls go down for bed at night is the perfect time.

So, wish me luck as I try and keep myself busy enough to forget how lonely I am without my man around! :)

~Emily

Where Dreams Meet Reality

The day the Lord births a dream in your heart is special. Even if you can't pinpoint the exact day and time, or the dream has been buried for years, you never fully forget what He spoke or the visions He gave. A few weeks ago, I had a conversation I'd never had before. A conversation about dreams. And not nighttime dreams. Deep-rooted, inspiring, God-given dreams. The ones you're almost too afraid to say out loud for fear of sounding self-righteous or arrogant.

This conversation was spurred on by the book, Dream Giver by Bruce Wilkinson. I've never read the book, but I know I need to! (If you've read it, tell me what you think!) In talking about the gist of the book, I was asked, "So Emily, what's your dream?" I paused. I could think of something to say, but I wasn't sure if I was being 100% honest. "Singing..." I started to say. Which is true, but... "Leading worship..." I continued. Which is also true, but...

There's more. It's deeper than leading worship through singing. Yet, I can't put my finger on it. I don't know how to put it to words other than to say...it's more complex than that. More intricate than that. I suppose I could say it's, "...beyond anything I could ask or imagine..." (Eph. 3:20) But it's hard to wait. We always want to see the full picture-not glimpses of it.

Last night, my good friend Stephanie & I had the opportunity to lead worship for a concert at Edmonds Community College. We were both honored to be asked and excited that the Lord opened up this door for us. We are both in a similar place in life-both waiting and looking for opportunities to use our gifts for the furtherance of the Kingdom. She has just finished her debut album and will be releasing it Aug. 14th! Come see and support her that night at Q Cafe in Seattle! : ) She has graciously invited me to open for her that night-what an honor!!! With all that said, it's exciting to step forward and watch these opportunities allow us to see our dreams meet reality.

May the Lord bless you today as you search the deepest parts of your heart for what His dream is for your life. Look long and hard and you might be surprised as to what surfaces. You may not have even thought of this dream since you were a kid. But it's still there!

"Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen."

Ephesians 3:20-21

Love,

Emily

A Tribute

Katherine Joy Lawrence.

Katy.

Auntie Katy.

Nanny.

Friend.

Sister in Christ.

Lover of Nerds (the candy...and possibly other types of nerds).

Dutch Bliss fanatic.

NCIS freak.

Gleek (Glee fans unite!)

I would have never imagined Katy and I to have the relationship we now have today. If you would have been a fly on the wall 5 or 6 years ago, you might have thought I disliked her. Which wasn't true, but honestly, she frustrated me. She was a girl who didn't know how to live her life victoriously (and I didn't really know how to help her).

Oddly enough, she trusted me. She trusted me with deep things, with fun things, with life things. And somehow through it all, we clicked. There was never an expectation to be best friends or spend every moment together. Our friendship just was. Over the years, the Lord has brought us together through mutual friends and that allowed us to spend more time getting to know each other. And I have seen a life changed. She is no longer the girl struggling to life her life in God's freedom. She is no longer the girl worried about what others might think of her. She is a woman shaped by the hand of God. Living day-by-day in His grace; knowing that He is her ROCK!

Back in September when Katy agreed to live with us and help watch the girls so I could go back to work, my life was changed. I didn't want to go back to work, but I needed to. That's hard. There are a lot of emotions tied in with leaving your babies every day. But Katy made it easier. I knew I could trust her. I knew she would be mom to my girls while I was away. That she would love them like I would love them and care for them like I would care for them. I couldn't have asked for anything more.

Tomorrow, Katy will leave our family. She will be traveling through Europe for the summer and then possibly be in another state in the fall. (If you don't see me for a while, check the mental institute, I might be there.) All joking aside,

I WILL MISS HER!!!!!!!!!!!

She has been my rock through these past 9 months. She has blessed me (us I should say) beyond what I can express with words. So, Auntie Katy, this blog entry is a tribute to you. Thank you for being such a huge blessing to our family! We love you very, very, very much!

Love always,
Ryan, Emily, Evie, Ella & Hero too!!!